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enter at your
own risk !

:: Gort! Klaatu Barada Nikto! ::
From Out Of Space... A Warning And An Ultimatum




Klaatu's speech


No Aliens were harmed (intentionally) in the production of this website  

I'm not crazy about reality,
but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
- Groucho Marx

This page is here for my own amusement

It has no socially redeemable value

I am wasting internet resources to

 learn MS Expression 4  & PHP

Have a nice day....and remember

It's never too late to

get a Life..?.

The 9000 series is the most reliable computer ever made. No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or distorted information. We are all, by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and incapable of error.


the fine print

Void where prohibited. All rights reserved. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental. Do not remove this disclaimer under penalty of law. Hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat. Do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle. Your mileage may vary. Do not expose to direct sunlight. No purchase necessary. Batteries not included. Slippery when wet. Not liable for damages arising from use or misuse. For external use only -- if rash, irritation, redness, or swelling develops, discontinue reading. Use only with proper ventilation. Store in a cool dry place. Keep away from open flames. Avoid contact with eyes and skin and avoid inhaling fumes. Do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit. If ingested, do not induce vomiting, and if symptoms persist, consult a physician. "We love you, Toho, oh yes we do. You are so wonderful, please do not sue". This disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes, and other Acts of God, neglect, damage from improper reading, incorrect line voltage, improper or unauthorized reading, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, mud slides, forest fire, or projectile (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BB's, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, and vomiting). Other restrictions may apply. Offer good for a limited time only. Don't call us, we'll call you. Don't ask me -- I just work here. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. An onion a day keeps everyone else away. Loose lips sink ships. In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the Lion sleeps tonight. Entities should not be multiplied needlessly. The square of the hypotenuse is equal to the sum of the squares of the two sides. What are you still reading this for? Go on -- go back to the main page. I mean it. Nothing to see here, folks -- move along. yadda, yadda, yadda....
If you're ready for a zombie apocalypse, then you're ready for any emergency.



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